Drink

Sweet Sipping

A guy’s guy explores his feminine side through cocktails

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I’m really not a cocktail kind of guy. I think it comes from disdainfully watching too many people copiously consume vodka sodas under the dubious logic that the low carb count won’t hurt their waistlines. These people must have never heard of calories nor multiplication. But once in a while something on a cocktail menu will jump out at me, and the latest occurrence was at DiParma Italian Table in Seekonk.

I had just finished a Sunday of shopping with my honey and we were famished. Tired of the usual, we decided to try something new and neither of us had ever been to DiParma. We settled into a booth and as I scanned the drink menu I was so enthralled by the concoctions, I was compelled to read all the recipes aloud. I couldn’t decide on a cocktail, so I did the inexplicable and ordered red wine. (It was cold out.) However, I introduced myself to the manager and arranged to return in a few weeks for some proper cocktail sampling.

I returned solo on a Monday night, or as luck would have it, $10 Monday. Every Monday night, all entrees – including pastas, chicken, seafood, pork and veal – are only $10. I sat at the bar and perused the menu. I thought some veal parmesan would make a nice, hearty drinking base but I was talked out of it by a nearby chatty Cathy who recommended the veal marsala. And I mean literally talked out of it: I didn’t change my mind because I thought this $10 Monday veteran was a gourmand, but because I hoped that by doing what she said she would finally stop talking so much. Luckily, her kindred spirit, talkative Tom, soon came along to occupy her and I was left to focus on the task at hand.


Behind the bar, my guide for the evening was the lovely Danielle. After explaining my mission, we agreed that I would try four half-servings off the specialty cocktail menu – not an everyday order, but one that would allow maximum sampling with minimal inebriation. Now some hard decisions had to be made. I immediately nixed the DiParma Espresso Martini (too ubiquitous) and the Blueberry Martini (had a blueberry muffin for breakfast and didn’t want to end up like Willy Wonka’s Violet). I briefly entertained the DiParma Mama for its watermelon liquor, but decided that the rest of the menu was more compelling.

First up was the Limoncello Martini, made with citrus vodka, limoncello and a dash of sour mix served in a sugar rimmed martini glass. The day had been an unusually warm 50 degrees and I was in a heavy sweater, so the first sip of this refreshing drink quickly turned into longer, hydrating gulps. Realizing that it was early, I forced myself to put the drink down. Cool, smooth and satisfying. We were off to a good start.

The next order was a Creamsicle Martini, made with Orange Whipped vodka, Blood Orangecello, a splash of orange juice and a splash of cream served in a sugar-rimmed glass. Danielle disappeared for quite some time and returned with the regrettable news that she searched high and low but could not find any Blood Orangecello. I had been looking forward to this drink the most, but looks like it will have to wait until my next trip.

As I searched the menu for a pinch hitter, Danielle brought me a Swedish Fish Martini. It’s made with Pinnacle Gummy vodka, triple sec and a dash of cranberry. It was tasty, but difficult to pull off as an adult male. At best, you’re a child with the Swedish Fish garnish; at worst, you’re a woman with the bright pink color. But if you’re in touch with both your inner child and your inner woman, definitely give it a go.

In place of the Creamsicle Martini, I went with Ben’s Homemade White Sangria, made with moscato, brandy and Mountain Dew. I had no idea what moscato was, but how could you go wrong with Mountain Dew? I tried the drink but couldn’t really pick up on the flavors, probably because I had no benchmark for moscato. Danielle was accommodating and gave me a small, straight taste of it on the side, mentioning that it was her favorite wine. It was light and fruity, very tasty on its own, but lost in the mix with everything else going on in the drink. Although this one wasn’t for me, expanding the palate made it a success.

Last but not least, the most dessert-like drink possible: the S’mores Martini. It’s made with Fluffed Marshmallow vodka, Bailey’s and crème de cacao served in a martini glass rimmed with chocolate and graham cracker crumbs. A few mini marshmallows are tossed in for good measure. This hit the spot as the decadent closing any good meal should have, and the creative garnishes were a particularly nice touch. Anybody out there know where I can get a glass rimmed in crème brulee?

The best part about all these drinks? Regular servings are only $8 each. Like I said, I don’t normally order cocktails, but I regularly hear complaints about prices. (“Do they think this is Manhattan?”). So $8 to me sounds like a good deal, and together with $10 Monday you’ve got a score. See you there. I still want some veal parmesan.

cocktails, diparma, italian, table, libations, seeking, limoncello, martini, sweedish, fish, martini, creamsicle, martini

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